Welcome to another version of Analyze This. Normally, when I do these posts, I analyze a once-popular song line by line to show the absurdity of it. In this version, I’m only going to look at one line from “Ramblin’ Man” by The Allman Brothers Band. I have heard this song countless times – and I think it’s a great song – but this post occurred to me as we listened to the copy of Brothers and Sisters that my four-year-old son got for Christmas (yes, you read that correctly).
“When it’s time for leavin’, I hope you’ll understand that I was born a ramblin’ man.” I realize that ramblin’ is a popular theme in music (Hank Williams sang about it long before the Allmans), so it’s not unique. But here’s the thing: when did this approach ever work on anyone? Just think about what he’s saying there. “Baby, I’m splittin’. No hard feelings, it’s just how I am.” I know that the 70s were a different time, but what woman would have ever been OK with that? Think about what would happen if you laid that line on your ol’ lady. You’d probably be lucky to come away from that with just a concussion from the blunt object she launched at your head. More likely, you’d end up driving yourself to the emergency room with a steak knife stuck between your ribs. Now, I’m not saying it’s impossible that a woman would go along with this and give the dude his walking papers. However, I have to imagine that if any woman ever did go along with it, she would probably be more likely to say “Good riddance!” than, “Yeah, you’re a rambler. I get it. Go ahead.” Seriously, if it were that easy to leave a woman, I imagine lots of guys would take out the trash, hop in the car, go somewhere far away and then send a postcard saying, “Hey baby. In case you haven’t noticed, I left. It’s just my wandering spirit. Hope you’re not mad.”